Unwritten

So, I logged on to my Facebook today, and I went to my profile to see what someone had posted on my wall, and I noticed that my boyfriend's name is no longer listed as the person I'm in a relationship with. I went to his page, of course, and noticed he has hidden his relationship status. It's Thanksgiving Break, and he is home with his family for the first time in months, and I told him I wouldn't bother him, but of course I suck at such things. So, I've texted him a few times a day, which, to be entirely honest, I don't think is excessive. Now, the other night when I was on pain killers and texted him groggily a lot of times in a row, that was probably excessive, I admit. So, after I saw that he had removed his relationship status, I immediately started to panic that he was going to break up with me... And now I'm writing this blog post to essentially tell myself that that is something entirely stupid to be panicking about. For one, why does it matter? Why ...

Remember when you were a kid, and you'd go to a water park, and at first the wave pool seemed really fun, but then you'd get brave and go out too deep, and the waves would catch you and be coming so fast you can't really get a breath, and you would get so scared that you weren't going to be able to swim back to where you could touch, and you're accidentally swallowing water and swimming as best as you can while your heart pounds? Eventually, you did always make it back to where you could touch or at least to the wall where you could hold on until the waves stopped. That didn't matter, though, because every time the waves started, and you began to feel like you were drowning, you were terrified. Yet for some reason, you would keep swimming out to where you couldn't touch, even when no one was asking you to go with them or expecting you to follow them. Maybe because almost dying was exciting or maybe because you wanted to challenge yourself or maybe you just c...

My family is... amazing. We haven't always gotten along, and we're all very different people, but there's something special about my family. I think a lot of other families would have fallen apart after all that we've been through, and trust me, we have had some short-term falling-outs, but over time my family has just gotten stronger. We have had to depend on each other and ask for each other's help so often, that somehow we've become this odd intertwined web. The last few weeks, we have been dealing with some major struggles, bigger than our usual money and stress struggles. One would think that after how much emotional energy has been expended lately, none of us would have much left to give. For some reason, though, my mom and my brother are here today essentially taking care of me. They've gone grocery shopping with me, cooked dinner for me, and are helping me give my apartment a good cleaning. They didn't have to do it, they didn't have to leave...