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Make a Wave

Ever since I was a little girl, the one thing I can consistently remember wanting to do was make the world a better place. I was a Girl Scout, and I didn't just memorize the words to that Promise and Oath, I really believed in them. When I was in church, my favorite times were when I was actively doing something to improve the lives of others. Even now, I feel completely useless if I am not doing something to help others on their path. I spent hours recording books onto cassette tapes for Sheltering Wings. Once, I came up with this great idea to help raise money for cancer research that I still haven't given up on. The physical labor that I got the most out of are the times I was working for free at food banks and things like that. And today? Today, if I could I would spend my life running Journeys for free and directing in community theaters for free, and I would honestly be truly happy with my life.

Right now, I am at a crossroads, and I can go one of two ways. Either I continue forward down the path of teaching in a classroom or I go forward with the plan to create the Journeys Performing Arts Center. I've decided I cannot do both nor can I go down one path and expect myself to be able to find my way back to the other. I have struggled with this decision for well over a year now, and I keep going back and forth between the two. Talking about being a teacher, it seems so much of the focus is on all the problems, all the difficulties, all the negativity that I will have to face. I don't feel my spirit light up, I don't even seem to smile at the thought. It just seems like the right answer after 4 years at Ball State. Yes, I'm going to be a teacher.

But... when I talk about JPAC... I feel so proud of myself for how far we have come with Journeys, how much we have achieved. I want to fight for it. I want to spread our passion and our ideas and our love of what we do. I get so on fire about it, even if it is just a dream that seems so impossible for someone my age to achieve, but is it really any more impossible than a college football player who wants to go to the NFL or a Musical Theatre Major who wants to go to Broadway? No... no in fact I would say I have a better shot at success than those people.

And so, while I have every intention of finishing my theatre education degree, I do not want to be a teacher stuck in a classroom complaining about the politics and all of the things the school district isn't giving them and should. I want to make a difference in the world, and I know now that the best way to do that is to follow my heart and my dreams and do what makes me happier than anything else in the world. After I graduate, I will move forward with opening and running the Journeys Performing Arts Center.

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